How do i improve a poem?

This is a difficult poem..partly because there is heart here, but the format is inconsistant. I'd suggest you figure out what you're trying to say, and start over. I know that sounds harsh, but there is an inconsistancy that runs throughout the poem and it needs to be corrected. The poem starts out okay, but the ending is lost in translation. Start again and lay out your stanza in accoradance with your ears.